Adopting a child is a life-changing experience. You are not just growing your family; you are making a commitment to love and protect someone for life. But with that joy comes the responsibility of making sure the adoption is done the right way.
Unfortunately, not all adoption journeys are ethical. Some agencies or facilitators cut corners, rush the process or pressure birth parents in ways that are not right. These red flags can affect not just you but the child and birth family as well. That is why staying informed every step of the way is so important.
Trust your gut
If something feels off, it probably is. Here are some red flags that may point to an unethical adoption:
- Rushed timelines: You are told the adoption must happen quickly, with little time to think or ask questions. A good agency will never rush such an important decision.
- Lack of transparency: You are not getting clear answers about fees, legal steps or the birth parents’ rights. Hidden information often hides bigger problems.
- Birth parent pressure: If you learn the birth parents were coerced, not given enough support or were not told their rights, the process may not be ethical.
- High fees with no breakdown: Adoption costs money, but you should always know where that money is going. Vague or secretive pricing is a red flag.
- No counseling offered: Ethical agencies provide counseling for both adoptive and birth parents before and after placement. If this is missing, something is wrong.
- Promises of a “guaranteed match:” No adoption can be guaranteed. This kind of language is often used to draw in hopeful parents without honesty.
Protecting everyone involved, especially the child, starts with making informed choices. If you are unsure about anything in the adoption process, you do not have to figure it out alone. You can benefit from seeking feedback from a trusted legal professional to help you spot issues early and keep your journey grounded in fairness and care.